My blog is pants...

Random stuff from the Bronster... especially good to read if you happen to like me.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Just got back from Chris's new One Man Show... and my eyes are stinging.
He ended the show with a story I could sense he was going to tell right from the beginning, so I was on the verge of tears all the way through. Am not going to go into the story as it's a personal part of his life (albeit one he just told a room full of strangers, but there you go), but I remember when he told me the story. It was about a month or two after we split up. It was the first time I felt he'd ever really opened up to me. And he waited til AFTER we split up!
But then that was our relationship all over really, all over and all over the place...
I still care very deeply for this wonderful man, and I always will I'm sure.
He made me think about how much people can mean to other people. I mean, this is nothing new obviously... but he talked about how much he loved his friend. It made me think how much I love my friends. I mean really love them, care what happens to them, worry about them all that proper love stuff.
I can probably only count people I know on a hand and a half who fit into that category (not including family). I'd like to think they know who they are. But then again, maybe they don't...
John, goes without saying, but I love this man. We are so in tune with each other, make each other laugh stupidly. I am always happy to see him and want to know everything he wants to tell me. I've not felt this happy for ever.
Welch, I don't see nearly enough of her. We were chatting today on the phone, and it was fun, I usually hate the phone, she makes me comfy on it :) I am excited for her and what she does in her life, and I'm always interested in her writing - however busy I am and can't read everything she wants me to. I'm very proud of her.
KT, is one of the nicest people I know, she can always make me smile and see sense. I worry about her a lot, she's been through so much, but yet manages to keep smiling. She's also hilarious. I don't think she realises this, but I idolise her sometimes, she is one of those people you just wish you were.
Julian. I worry about him too. He's worth so much, and I don't think he realises it. If I could take all his worry's and insecurities away I would in a second. Without them I truly think he could take over the world.
Ben. Good GOD this man winds me up! But a hug is worth a million pounds. He's such a sweet man, he needs to open his ears a bit more sometimes though ;) He has an amazing gift, he can get people, figure them out, and he gives great advice.... sometimes ;)
Keya. We have a weird relationship. If we're in good moods we can piss ourselves laughing for hours. If we're in bad moods it's horrible. I care a stupid amount for this little girl... not that she's a little girl at all... but I always looked after her when we were little, and I'm sure I'll keep trying to do that even when we're old and wearing Tena Lady.
Jill. You are a new addition Jill! We seem to just click, I can't wait to spend new year with you :) It hurts my heart when I read about how stressed and anxious she gets and can empathise so much. We can talk about wacky silliness, and then stuff, like, about boys and stuff. She has brilliant dress sense and cools cars and furniture... i read somewhere she wrote about how she wanted to be like me.. well, I want to be like her.. maybe we can meet in the middle.
So then there's Chris. Little things that used to annoy me when we were together are now endearing. Which proves more how we were meant to be best friends and not partners. He has his faults like anyone, but he has the warmest and biggest heart out of anyone I know. When we were together I just wanted to fix everything for him, because he's such a nice person - nothing should hurt him. But I couldn't. No one can. You have to do these things for yourself... and in the last 6 months, it looks like, without me around, he's done that. And I'm so happy for him. I annoy him nowadays, I wind him up, he winds me up, he makes me cry, I make him cry... it's a vicious circle. But it's only cos I care so much for him. He knows that. He has a lot of people he can confide in, tell things to... a room full of people for one thing!
I have this hand full and a half of people.
and I love you.

Oh... and ps - the Store match ROCKED!!!!
I will write more about that when I'm not crying.

3 Comments:

  • At November 09, 2007 1:27 pm, Blogger Jillo said…

    I only just found this. Aw. Thank you, Bron.

    I love you right back.

    And I worry about you with your huge amounts of stress.

    Maybe we are each other sometimes.

    I can't wait to see you in just a few short weeks.


    I! LOVE!! BRON!!!!

     
  • At November 11, 2007 1:05 pm, Blogger Rachel said…

    I realised today how long it's been since I looked at any blogs, let alone my own. (Damn facebook!) This was a lovely way to come back to it. Especially cause I know I can be a naggy pain in the butt (only cause I love you though). So proud of everything you're achieving at the moment missy - and looking forward to having you down in London for a bit - it has indeed been a year of scarce meetings. Here's to a more interactive 2008!

     
  • At November 11, 2007 9:18 pm, Blogger Bron said…

    mwah!

     

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